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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/30133869">Timeless</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/Hipsher/pseuds/Hipsher'>Hipsher</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>NCT (Band)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Doyoung is the tea king, Gen, Gender-Neutral Pronouns, I'm Bad At Tagging, Mentioned Liu Yang Yang, Mentioned Moon Taeil, Mentioned Osaki Shotaro, Mentioned Wong Yuk Hei | Lucas, Mentioned Zhong Chen Le, Originally Posted on Tumblr, Sad with a Happy Ending, Song: Timeless (NCT U)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2021-03-19</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2021-03-19</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-15 16:49:36</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>General Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>9,514</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/30133869</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/Hipsher/pseuds/Hipsher</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Welcome to the Heartbreak Hotel! Where you can be treated for whatever wounds your poor heart has tolerated. Heartbreak Hotel has 23 employees, all of whom will be wholeheartedly devoted to healing your heart, after which you shall be asked to leave. Heartbreak Hotel not only offers never-seen-before deals and techniques, it also has special floors to regulate the healing of your heart! </p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Huang Ren Jun/Reader</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>5</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>Timeless</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>This is part of the Heartbreak Hotel collaboration hosted by @nct-writers on Tumblr. This is my first ever collaboration and I had so much fun being apart of this.</p><p>Warning: I chose Renjun who works on the depression floor so hopefully this is kinda sad. But it ends happy! </p><p>I hope you enjoy!</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    
<p></p><div class="">
<p></p><div class=""><p>“Hi y/n.”</p></div><div class=""><p>You turn your attention away from your phone, looking up to see the new employee you would be working with. New day, new stage, new employee.</p></div><div class=""><p>“As you know, my name is Renjun, and I’ll be working with you on this floor.”</p></div><div class=""><p>Setting your phone on the table screen down, you watch as he pulls out the chair across from you. He’s young– like everyone else in the hotel– and as he sits down, you can’t help but notice how small he is.</p></div><div class=""><p>“Want to tell me why you’re here?”</p></div></div><div class="">
  <p>You laugh humorlessly, looking down at your sleeves as you play with them. “You know why I’m here, it’s all in the paperwork.”</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>He smiles kindly, crossing his legs. “What if I told you I haven’t read the paperwork yet?”</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>You crack a light smile. “Then I’d say you’re not the best at your job.”</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>He nods his head, his small smile still spread across his face. “Well then, why don’t you tell me what happened so I don’t get fired?”</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>Quite frankly, you hate that you’re here. You never understood the need for this place when a good friend is all you need. After all, why talk to seven different strangers, and relive the hurt seven different times when you can tell one person one time. One and done.</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>But what happens when it’s your best friend who breaks your heart?</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>“I would really prefer it if you talked to one of the other employees I talked to or read the paperwork. I can’t keep talking about this, I-”</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>You snap your mouth shut and close your eyes. You can already feel the tears burning your eyelids, and you bring your hands from your lap to hold your head in your hands, elbows resting on the table.</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>
    <em>God, I hate crying. </em>
  </p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>“Y/n, I know this is hard. But talking about it makes it better, that’s why we have our seven floors. We believe it takes a least a week to get a proper grip on your heartbreak, to be able to go back out and be-” he brings his hands up in a gesture of quotation marks, “‘Okay.’”</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>“I get that, it makes sense. I don’t know what the people who come in here are normally like, but I can’t talk about my feelings that often. It’s too hard.”</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>“I get that. It’s a good thing I don’t like to jump into the touchy-feely stuff right away. So why don’t you tell me what happened?” He smiles softly, and like everyone else in this hotel, you can feel a sense of comfort radiating from him. “We don’t even have to talk about feelings if you don’t want to.”</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>You nod your head, dropping your hands onto the table. “My best friend, she cut me out. She stopped answering my texts and wouldn’t pick up my phone calls.” You scoff as the memory plays through your mind. “She even went as far as to stand me up the one time I was able to get through to her. She was too busy partying.”</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>“So that’s why you’re here?”</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>You shake your head, refusing to meet his eyes. You feel so stupid talking with a stranger about your problems. Problems you should be solving on your own.</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>But it was eating you alive. Then one night, talking to a few strangers seemed less scary than sitting with those thoughts alone for another night.</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>“No, I’m here because I finally got the courage to tell her I was done if things kept going the way they were. That I was done being in a one-sided relationship.”</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>“How did that go?”</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>“It went well. She sent me a response saying she was sorry and that she never meant to hurt me. I thought it was going to be okay and that I was going to have my best friend back.” You smile sadly as her smiling face flashes through your mind. “You know she’s my oldest friend?”</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>He smiles, resting his head on his clasped hands. “Oh really?”</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>You nod your head. “I had moved to a new city so, of course, I didn’t have anyone. I joined a play to make new friends, and there she was. She’s everything I’m not, good and bad. I think I thought I could help her not be so sad. I thought I was, I mean, she told me I was. She told me I was special to her.”</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>“From my experience,” he says softly, “people don’t normally lie about that sort of thing. I’m sure you meant something to her. Now, of course, I’m not her so I can’t say for sure.”</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>You haven’t talked to many people about your recent heartbreak– specifically, only one person– but when you had, you had gotten a very stereotypical answer. “You don’t need her, she doesn’t know what she’s missing.”</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>You appreciated the thought, but it didn’t help. Simply hearing that it would be okay and that she didn’t know what she was missing didn’t help fight the feelings of nothingness that threatened to take over.</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>“You’re right, neither of us are her, so we’ll never know. But you wanna know my theory?”</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>“Shoot.”</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>“I think I used to mean something to her. And then, she found someone else.”</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>His eyes softened, and if you had to guess, he had just figured out why you had moved to this floor.</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>“Okay y/n, here’s what we’re going to do. I don’t know about you, but I’m tired of sitting here. So you’re going to give me a list of your favorite snacks– whether that’s chocolate, chips, fruit, or all of the above– and your favorite movie from your childhood.”</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>You stared at him, scanning his eyes. He didn’t say anything either, looking back at you with a calm expression.</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>You couldn’t understand. This hotel has been in business for three years now, and no doubt every employee is good at their job. If Renjun is any good at his job, he would have a pretty good, if not solid, idea why you had moved to the Depression floor. So why stop now?</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>“I don’t- why?”</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>He shrugs his shoulders, leaning back in his chair. “Well, when I’m sad, my favorite thing is to just go back to my childhood.”</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>“But don’t you want to know more? We didn’t even get into the root of it.”</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>He shifts in his chair, crossing his legs. “I know, but you said you don’t like feelings. Like you said, you have to recount this event multiple times. Right now, you’re in one of the hardest stages of this journey. You already passed through what, in my mind, are two of the hardest stages. There’s no doubt in my mind you’re tired and just ready for the hardness to end.</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>“Once you’re ready to move on, whether that's tomorrow or next week, you’ll be moving onto easier steps.” He smiles brightly. “Now, I don’t want you looking back on your time with me and thinking it was horrible. So, I was thinking, we could have a little party to bring some of the joy that comes in the later stages to us now.”</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>You don’t know what you were expecting, but it wasn’t a party. When your friend sent you the details of this hotel, you read they offered “never-seen-before deals and techniques.” Until now, you couldn’t imagine what that meant. </p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>Clearing your throat, you give Renjun one of the weakest smiles you’ve ever given anyone. <em>He’s right, I am tired. </em></p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>“Okay, sounds good,” you agreed.</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>He smiles brightly, standing up from the table. “Awesome, you’ll find my contact in the hotel app you downloaded. Text me your list and the movie, and I’ll see you when I get back from the store.”</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>You nod your head, waving back at him as he slips out the door.</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>You let out a deep breath, looking up towards the left, and fanning your eyes. Bringing your eyes to look at the door, you hit your hand against your chest above your heart twice. You appreciate his efforts. You appreciate the hotel’s efforts, but you’re so tired.</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>You’ve cried so much since you checked in, not to mention you’ve been in a foreign place for the past few days meeting new people every time you progressed with your heartbreak.</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>Just when you felt you were getting somewhere, you were moved to a different floor and had to get comfortable with a new employee. You understand why they did it; having specialists for each stage of heartbreak is a great idea.</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>A great idea in theory, but exhausting in practice</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>Shaking your head, you pick up your phone to start making a list of things you’d like him to buy.</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>---</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>“Come in,” you call, hearing a knock at your door.</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>“I’m sorry I’m so late,” Renjun says, walking into the room holding a bag of groceries in one hand and two sweatshirts slung over his other arm. “It took me forever to find this one thing, and by the time I had, of course traffic had to be terrible. So what started as a thirty-minute mission turned into an hour-long one.”</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>“It’s okay, it’s not like I have anywhere to be,” you say, motioning to how you were sitting on the bed, the blanket pulled over your lap.</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>“I know, but I still made you wait.” He sets the bags at the bedside, taking a seat at the foot of the bed. He smiles widely as he takes the sweatshirts from around his arm and lays them out on the bed. “Now, on top of snacks, I also brought oversized sweaters. Take your pick!”</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>You look at the two sweatshirts, one yellow and one grey, before reaching out to grab the grey one and pulling it into your lap. <em>I was starting to get a little cold.</em></p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>Sticking your hand inside one of the sleeves, you smile at the soft feeling. “Is this why you asked to first meet me at six? You wanted to do this?”</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>He grabs the yellow sweatshirt and pulls it over his head as he answers. “Yeah. Most of the staff like to get to know new clients over lunch or dinner, but I like this method better. Breaks up the routine and spices up everyone’s life.”</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>You nod your head, looking up from the sweatshirt to him. You let out a small, ‘oh,’ realizing he was still sitting at the foot of the bed.</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>“You can sit here,” you say softly, patting the spot next to you.</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>He bends down to grab the bag before crawling to sit next to you, dumping the bag of snacks onto the bed between you two.</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>“What are these?” you ask, picking up a snack bag with Chinese characters on it.</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>“Oh, these are some of my favorite snacks from when I was little. I normally don’t buy them</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>when I go out for a client’s snacks, but I’ve been feeling particularly homesick lately.”</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>“You’re from China?”</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>“Yep!”</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>You tilt your head to the side, flipping the bag to look at the back. “How’d you end up working for this hotel?”</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>“My friend Chenle – he also works on this floor – told me about his cousin Kun who was starting this hotel with his friend Taeyong, who he met while studying abroad here in Korea. We thought it was a cool idea, so we dragged our other friend Yangyang down with us. It’s actually how most of the foreign members got here. Sicheng-Ge is Kun-Ge’s friend, Yuta-Hyung is Taeyong-Hyung’s friend, Shotaro is Yuta-Hyung’s friend, Mark-Hyung and Johnny-Hyung came through Ten-Hyung, and God knows how Ten-Hyung showed up.”</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>You snort, placing the bag back in the middle and grabbing one of the brown snack bags he bought for you. “That sounds fun. Do you all get along?”</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>“I mean, of course, we get along.” He pauses, pursing his lips in thought, before shrugging his shoulders. “I mean, I don’t really know some of the older staff that well, and I don’t know Sungchan or Shotaro that well either, but we all get along.”</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>“So it’s like you have a massive family gathering every day?”</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>“A family gathering.” He turns to you, smiling. “That’s a perfect way to put it.”</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>He looks down at the bedside table before twisting over and reaching for the remote. He hums as he scrolls through the apps, looking for a specific one. You watch silently as he flicks through them, trying to push back the sudden thoughts on why you're here.</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>
    <em>Tonight is about watching a childhood movie and temporarily forgetting the heartbreak. Easy enough.</em>
  </p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>“Are you ready for the best movie night you will have here at Heartbreak Hotel?”</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>You smile at the excitement in his voice. <em>He seems genuinely excited to watch this movie.</em></p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>“Ready.”</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>He makes a point to dramatically press play before dropping the remote between you two and picking up one of the bags he bought for himself. He shifts around on the bed, pulling his knees close to him.</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>Suddenly, the closeness of the action hits you. You can’t remember the last time someone did something like this for you.</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>You love your friend who helped get you here, they mean a lot to you. But after your other friend started ignoring you, you had never felt so alone before. Loneliness turned to pushing people away, which meant you had no one to come and spend time with you. Maybe you were too good at convincing your friends you were okay, but you were hoping they’d surprise you with something.</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>You know you aren’t thinking straight, so you can’t help but think the fact your friend hadn’t tried to cheer you up and your best friend dropping you was because of you. Maybe you’re too boring, too serious.</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>You shake your head, quickly wiping away a few tears. <em>No, now is not the time to be wallowing in self-pity. Not while watching a kid’s movie. </em></p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>“Are you okay?”</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>You sigh, pulling the sleeves of the sweatshirt over your hands, not looking away from the movie. “I’m just so tired, Renjun.”</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>He nods his head in understanding. “I can imagine, it’s hard what you’re going through. Of course, I’m not forcing you to talk to me about it. I’m here to help you y/n, and if that is just sitting with you and watching movies then so be it. But it does help to talk about it, that’s why we’re here.”</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>You close your eyes, leaning against the wall. “I just feel stuck. I thought coming here would be hard. I mean, crying is one of the hardest things for me to do. Then I’m sitting here with you, and I want to tell you everything. There’s, um, there’s just this fear. If I tell you my thoughts, why I’m here, then along with those feelings come the feelings of self-pity. I’m so scared of self-pity, Renjun.”</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>“I know what you’re talking about, and I know how helpless that can feel. Truth is, we feel what we feel. Some things are good to ignore, like the urge I sometimes get to just punch Chenle or Yangyang.” You tilt your head to the side to look at him, and he smiles at you. “You’re right to be somewhat afraid of those feelings. It’s easy to let them consume you. But do you want to know my basic rule of thumb?”</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>You adjust your head to look back at the movie, watching mindlessly as the film plays in front of you. “Sure.”</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>“Give yourself two days to feel sorry for yourself, and if after two days those feelings are still there, pick yourself up and move on. Those feelings don’t have to be gone completely, but after two days you have to start living your life again.”</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>“Can those two days start tomorrow?”</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>“Of course y/n, we go at your pace.”</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>---</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>“Good morning y/n, fancy some ice cream?” Renjun asks, swinging the door open.</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>“Good morning Renjun.” You check the clock on the bedside table. “It’s 12:30 in the afternoon.”</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>“So?” He leans against the closed door, arms crossed. “I’m in the mood for ice cream and either I go with you or by myself. And if you ask me, talking to you is way more fun than talking to myself.”</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>“I don’t know Renjun, I’m kind of tired. Plus, I was hoping we could talk before I lose the courage to.”</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>He nods, uncrossing his arms and pushing off the door. “Okay, then change of plans. We talk first and then get ice cream.” He makes his way over to you, extending his hand out to you. “Either way, you should leave that bed and this room.”</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>You smile slightly, taking his hand as he helps pull you up from the bed. He smiles brightly, dropping his hand to his side. “We’re going outside, so if you need to grab anything for that, now’s your chance! I’ll be right out by the door, so when you’re ready, come and get me.”</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>Before you can say anything, he is already walking out the room.</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>“Renjun, wait.”</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>He turns around, a hand on the doorknob. “Yeah?”</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>“Why are we going outside? I thought we were going to talk first.”</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>“We are.” He looks around the room before his eyes land back on you, a smile lighting his face. “You need a change of scenery.”</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>With that, he pulls open the door and walks into the hallway.</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>You tilt your head slightly, confused at the random action. You thought the first thing you two would do today would be to talk. He seemed like the kind of person to want to get the talking out of the way.</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>But now he’s taking you somewhere to get ice cream? You shake your head, bending to grab your phone from the bed before walking towards the door to pull on your shoes.</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>“That was fast,” he smiles, pushing himself off the wall.  </p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>“Yeah, I was already dressed so all I had to do was put my shoes on. If you weren’t in such a hurry, you would’ve seen that,” you tease.</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>He shrugs his shoulders, turning to walk down the hallway. “Had I done that, you might have objected. But look at us now.”</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>You chuckle at his statement, walking the rest of the way to the elevators in silence.</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>“Where are we going?” you ask as he pushes the down button.</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>“You’ll see.” He smiles, walking into the elevator.  </p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>When the elevator opens on the bottom floor, he leads you out and to the left towards a door with a sign “staff only” taped at the front. He pulls the door open, and walks in before holding the door open behind him for you. It’s a small room, with the only things inside being a white board hung on the wall and a door leading outside. Once you’re in, he takes the whiteboard marker from the top of a whiteboard and writes an RJ in one of the 7 boxes taped out on the board.</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>“You’re going to love this,” he says, pressing the pen back into its holder before walking to the door.</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>When you step out, you’re met with what you can only describe as a garden straight out of a movie. A gravel pathway led to what looks like a hedge maze. As he leads you towards the entrance of the maze, you reach your hand out to touch the bush.</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>He leads you past two doors built into the hedge, one on the left and one on the right. When you two reach the second set of doors, he pulls open the one on the left and motions for you to go in. Upon entering, you’re surrounded by hedge on all sides.</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>Opposite the door, a black metal bench sat in front of the hedge. Across from the bench and to the left of the door, a beautiful flower wall, full of white, peach, and red colored flowers covered a majority of the hedge.</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>“Renjun, it’s beautiful,” you marveled, taking a seat on the bench. “I didn’t know you guys had an area like this.”</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>He nods his head, taking a seat next to you, and looking at the scenery around the bench. “Yeah, it's really beautiful out here. There’s a section out here for each floor, and since we have multiple employees on each floor, it’s first come first serve. But I’ve used space assigned to another floor when Chenle or Mark-Hyung were using this one, so it doesn’t really matter.”</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>You nod your head. “I imagine that has caused some troubles.”</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>“No, surprisingly not yet.” He takes a deep breath, and out of the corner of your eye, you see him tilt his head up to the sky. “I always think better outside- it feels less confining. So I thought this would be a better place to talk as opposed to somewhere with four walls and a ceiling. You also don’t have to worry about others hearing you here. No one else signed in. With that in mind, feel free to start talking whenever you’re comfortable. We have all day.”</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>As soon as he’s done talking, a silence falls between you two. Taking a deep breath, you close your eyes as you push back the thoughts telling you it was a trap. You know that by telling him everything, it would get hard. You knew the self-pity you were so scared of would worm its way in after every word you said to him.</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>Living with that would be better than how muted you felt now.</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>“I’m just tired and scared.” You start slowly, letting out a shaky breath. “My entire life, I’ve had trouble getting close to people. For as long as I can remember, I’ve only had two friends. I mean, sure, I had people who were nice to me and we could have nice conversations, but we weren’t friends. I’ve long since accepted that I’ll never be anyone’s first choice; my dad would pick my sister over me, my friend who sent me here would pick her childhood friend, and my friend who left picked her other friends over me.”</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>You quickly wipe your eyes, taking a deep breath before you continue. “I don’t care about that- it is what it is. I just never expected her to leave me like that, to just cut me out of her life. When she first started doing it, I told myself I was fine. I’m not dumb I know that it isn’t solely my fault she distanced herself. She has a hard life, and I’m sure that’s a major reason this is happening– I’ve already worked this out on the anger floor– but at the same time, I can’t help but think it’s because of me.”</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>A sob escapes your mouth, and you bring your hand to rest against your forehead. Squeezing your eyes shut, you try and get your breathing under control again.</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>You’re sick of crying, it’s all you’ve been doing this past week. If you weren’t crying, you were ignoring the numb feeling that has made a home in your gut. The same feeling that took away some of the joy you should be feeling at all the genuine acts Renjun and the rest of the staff have shown you.</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>You’re sick of living with muted feelings.</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>“You already said you knew it wasn’t because of you that she did what she did. I know it’s hard, but don’t backtrack on those feelings. Don’t let the hurt you feel from losing a friend turn those thoughts around on you.”</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>You lean forward, placing your elbows on your knees and your head in your hands. “I know, I know, but it’s so hard. It’s just, my mom and I aren’t on the best of terms right now. I mean, there was a time in my life when she would just leave for months to go on vacation by herself.”</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>You shake your head hoping to straighten out your thoughts, sitting back up. You wipe your eyes, pushing back any thoughts of how you must look right now. “It’s like, every night before I fall asleep, I’ll remember a funny or happy moment we had together. With that memory, the reality that I can never go back to a time when she wanted me hurts. Which makes me come full circle to if it took my mom years to even want to be around me, doesn’t it make sense that the same thing that pushed her away since birth pushes one of my closest friends away?”</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>The silence that follows is deafening. You don’t blame him for being at a loss for words, frankly, you have no idea what you’d say to someone in your position. Even if it is his job, having strangers pour their hearts out to him probably never gets easy.</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>“I’m sorry,” you whisper, his lack of words making you feel anxious you had said something wrong. “It’s just I-”</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>Before you could continue your explanation, Renjun cuts you off. “Don’t apologize to me unless you do something to hurt me or the people I care about.”</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>You turn your head to face him, the sincerity in his voice surprising you. He flashes you a quick smile before turning his attention back towards the wall in front of him.</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>“With regards to your friend, I think what you need to do is practice taking a break from the problem. Clear your head and then approach it from an outside view. To give you a head start on that outside view, let me offer you mine.</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>“I don’t know the whole story, so feel free to call me out on anything wrong. But sometimes people just leave because their lives are going in different directions. You told me she has a hard life, so maybe her cutting you out is just an unfortunate consequence. This can be said about your mom and her- some people are just self-destructive and scared. Maybe they saw their relationship with you as something that will last a long time. Something like that can be scary to some people, so if I had to guess, part of them leaving is tied to them being scared. I’m not asking you to forgive her or to ignore your feelings on the relationship, but maybe if you can look at it as the result of someone hiding from their fear, it could help you.”</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>You nod your head, letting the words sink in. You don’t know if you’re ready to accept that reasoning- or if it’s what you’re even looking for- but it’s nice to hear something different than what your mind is telling you.</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>“I know losing a friend is hard,” he continues, not looking away from the flower wall in front of you two, “but by the time you are out of this hotel, you’re going to realize that it has nothing to do with your personality. I know this is only the second day we’ve spent together, but I like being around you. I’ve had many people come through here, some good and some bad, and I can confidently say you’re part of the good group. I’m not just saying this because it’s my job, but I enjoy spending time with you y/n.”</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>After he finishes talking, you quickly wipe away the hot tears escaping from your eyes. You have a few people you know you romanticize in your mind. There was the boy from your sixth-grade math class who walked you to your next class, arm wrapped around your shoulders as you bawled your eyes out about another fight you had with your mom. There was also the girl you met at summer camp who was a complete stranger to you, yet took the time to walk you from the cafeteria to your cabin after you threw up from food poisoning. They’re both perfect examples of that romanticization.</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>Those had been random acts of kindness during times you thought you were alone. Each time, you remember being amazed there were people like this around you. People brave enough to help someone they didn’t know.</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>Once again, you feel your heart warm from the same type of kindness, and you find yourself struggling to comprehend how someone can be so nice.</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>Renjun takes a deep breath and looks over at you, breaking you from your thoughts. “Not that there’s any rush, but is there anything else that you wanted to tell me?”</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>You quickly shake your head, taking deep, shaky breaths to try and stop crying.</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>He nods his head, a shining smile breaking out across his face. “I don’t know about you, but I think the only thing that can make us feel better is ice cream. So how about, when you feel up to it, we go and get some?”</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>You nod your head, sniffling once. “Okay, just- just give me a second, and then I’ll be ready.”</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>“Again, there’s no rush. We move at your pace, however fast or slow that is.”</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>---</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>“Having trouble deciding?”</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>You glance at the stranger to your left before looking back at the assortment of teas. “I guess so.”</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>“Well this one,” the stranger says, pointing to one of the boxes of black tea, “is my personal favorite. If you’re in the mood for something without caffeine, this is the tea to go. If you want chai, we have milk in the fridge– which I suggest you use instead of water– with one packet of sugar, and you have yourself the best chai tea ever.”</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>You laugh softly, leaning against the counter. “Sounds like you know your stuff.”</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>He smiles, reaching for the black tea he pointed to. “Kim Doyoung is the name, tea is the game.”  </p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>You snort, pushing off the counter and reaching for the chai tea. “Well Doyoung, I’m excited to try your recipe.”</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>“If you’re disappointed, you can file a complaint against me. You’ll find me on the Reconstruction floor,” he jokes, his back turned to you as he pours hot water from the water dispenser into his cup.  </p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>“Noted. And since you’re a staff member, you aren’t going to kick me out if I use the stove and one of your pans to heat some milk, are you?”</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>“It’s the public kitchen, so you don’t have to worry about anyone kicking you out,” he chuckles, walking to one of the small tables and taking a seat. “As long as you wash the pot out, we don’t care what you do.”</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>“Good to know.”</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>Walking over to the refrigerator, you sigh softly as you pull open the door.</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>
    <em>It’s been a long day. </em>
  </p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>Grabbing the milk from off the side rack, you use your foot to hold open the door as you pour some milk into your cup. Once you’re finished, you screw the lid back on and move to put the milk back.</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>“Oh, you can keep it out. I forgot I was going to add some to mine.” He smiles as he pushes himself up from the table. “I don’t even know why I sat down.”</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>You chuckle. “I feel that.”</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>Squatting down to open one of the cupboards to look for a pot, you wince slightly at the sound of pots hitting each other as you move the pots to get to the smallest one. “Not to sound mean, but shouldn’t you be helping someone?”</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>“I could say the same thing about you, I mean, you’re down here all by yourself. Do I need to get someone fired? ”</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>You place the pot on the stove and pour in the milk from your cup. “Fair point. But luckily for you, you don’t have to fire anyone. I practically had to chase him away so I could have a moment by myself.”</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>He chuckles, pouring some milk into his tea. “May I ask who you have?”</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>“Renjun.”</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>“Yeah, that sounds like Renjun,” he chuckles, pulling open the fridge to put away the milk. Turning around, he leans against the counter, picking up his cup to take a drink. “You got lucky with him, he’s my second favorite of the younger staff.”</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>You snort, tearing a sugar packet and pouring it into the milk. “Who’s first?”</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>“Jeno. He works on the floor above Renjun’s.”</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>“Well, if I get the opportunity to work with him I’ll be sure to tell him he has to live up to the expectations set by tea king Kim Doyoung.”</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>“Please do, it’s been a while since I’ve told him I’m proud of him.”  </p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>You smile, turning off the heat and moving the pot to a different burner.</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>“I just realized,” he says, pulling you from your thoughts. “I never asked for your name.”</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>“Oh, I’m y/n.”</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>“Well, it’s nice to meet you y/n. It’s nice to have someone to share my tea knowledge with.”</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>“Are you telling me that in a hotel of 23 men, there is no one else who likes tea?” you ask sarcastically, pouring the milk into your cup and dropping the teabag in.</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>“There are, they just don’t like to listen to me. They tell me I’m too bossy.”</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>You let out a loud laugh, quickly covering your mouth with your hand. You look over to him, and he simply nods his head, a knowing look spread across his face.</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>You clear your throat, turning your attention back to your tea, stifling laughter as you pour a sugar packet in. “That sounds sad, I’m sorry.”</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>“It’s fine, they don’t know what they’re missing.”</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>You nod your head, tossing the packet into the trash and moving the pan to the sink to wash it. “That’s a good attitude to have, stay strong.”</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>“I’m as good at being petty as I am at anything else.”</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>You snort, squirting some soap onto the sponge to wash the pot. “Are you open to some feedback?”</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>“Go for it.”</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>“Okay, well for one, I don’t think that’s a good thing. And two, I don’t think that’s a saying.”</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>“All valid points,” he starts, and you hear the clink of what you assume is him putting his cup on the counter, “but let me tell you why they aren’t actually valid. Petty is how I’ve made my way in this hotel. Ten is something else, and I may have picked up a few things from him. Secondly, I don’t know what’s a saying and what isn’t, so that has no effect on me.”</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>“I don’t think it works like that.”</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>“It does.”</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>You chuckle, turning off the water, and placing the pan on the drying rack. “Well, I can say you’ll have no trouble staying strong.”</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>He dips his head in a thank you, and you laugh softly. Drying your hands on the towel hanging on the oven handle, you turn around to grab your cup.</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>“Well, I’m going to go up now, I have books to read and TV to watch. Thank you for the tea recommendation, I’ll be sure to try the other ones you pointed out.” You nervously pat the side of your cup twice, letting your eyes wander around the room before looking back at him. “This might be kinda weird considering this is our first time meeting, but thank you for having this conversation. It was nice to talk to someone who isn’t involved in my life. That, and you made today slightly less awful.”</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>He smiles, and you’re finally struck by how beautiful it is.</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>Renjun’s smile always struck you as a warm, comforting one. It fit perfectly for the floor he worked on. Doyoung’s, however, is different. While he still radiates comfort, his smile is more of a hopeful one. The kind that brightens even the worst days.</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>“I’m glad I could help. It was lovely talking with you y/n, and I hope I get to work with you when you reach my floor. It would be nice to see you again.”</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>You smile, rubbing your finger against the side of the cup. “Yeah, it would be nice to work with you. Maybe have a tea party where we talk about our feelings and my journey here.”</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>He laughs, walking up to you and tapping his cup lightly against yours. “I look forward to it.”</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>---</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>“I brought strawberries,” Renjun sings, opening the door.</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>You smile softly, pausing the show you were watching and patting the spot in front of you on the bed. “What’s with you and randomly showing up with food?”</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>He shrugs, placing one hand on the wall to balance himself as he uses his feet to take his shoes off. “I think spontaneous food is good for healing the soul. Trust me, I’m an expert.”</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>“Expert,” you repeat, laughing at his choice of words.</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>“Speaking of experts,” he says, taking a seat in front of you and placing the container of strawberries between you two, " I heard from Doyoung-Hyung that you two talked. How was that?"</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>"Well, for starters, he said Jeno was his favorite."</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>He snorts, picking up a strawberry. "That's nothing new."</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>"Isn’t Doyoung one of the members you said you don’t know very well?” you ask, taking a bite of the strawberry in your hand.</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>He nods his head, covering his mouth with his hand as he finishes chewing. “All the younger staff have an older member they’re particularly close with, and then the rest range from comfortable to the most awkward situation you could ever be in. Funny considering we have those parties when a client leaves, so you think we’d all be close by now. Anyway, me and Doyoung-Hyung are somewhere in the middle of that scale.”</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>“You guys really are like a family.”</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>He nods his head, placing another stem into the bowl he brought with him. “How’d you sleep last night?”</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>You smile softly, picking up a strawberry so you would have something for your hands to play with. “If you’re talking about if I thought about her or not, I did. I know it was earlier in the day, but I even almost texted her. That’s why I texted you asking if I could use the kitchen, I wanted something to distract me.”</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>“How do those memories make you feel?”</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>“Sad.” You laugh humorlessly, running your finger over the leaf. “I have photos on my phone from when we permed her hair. Most of those photos are of her, but the ones I’m in, you can see I’m laughing. It was such a fun day, we laughed so much. I thought I was getting better about the whole situation, but then I saw those photos, and I realized I’m still stuck in that time. And like I said before we talked in the garden, I can’t stop feeling sorry for myself now that I’ve vocalized the connection I feel between her and my mom. I normally have pretty good self-views, but once I get an idea like this in my head, it’s so hard to get it out.”</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>“My first piece of advice is to be more gentle with yourself. Remember, today is your second day of sitting with those feelings. I think to start moving on from this stage, you have to be in tune with what you’re feeling. If you aren’t aware of what it is that’s hurting you, it will come back to you later. As much as I like being with you, I don’t want to see you here again.”</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>You smile softly, taking a small bite of the strawberry to try and distract yourself from the tears pricking at your eyes. “Thanks, Renjun.”</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>“My second piece of advice,” he says, tapping your knee to bring your attention up to him, “don’t hide from the memories. Even if you can’t go back to that day, doesn’t mean you don’t have to ignore those memories completely. I know it isn’t the same, but I have a photo from my friend’s birthday party from like five years ago back in China. It’s of me, my friend, and some guy he was friends with at the time. Turns out, the guy wasn’t very nice and they had this whole drama thing.”</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>He waves his hand dismissively. “Back to the point, they’re not friends anymore. And when that happened, my friend had been so sad. He deleted every photo of the two of them and cropped him out of any group photos he could. But I still have my photo of the three of us. Even though I look at him and am reminded of all the stuff he put one of my best friends through, I still smile when I pass it by in my camera roll. Because that day was filled with great memories between me and my friend.</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>“Now, in your case, you can still look at those photos and remember how happy you were that day. They don’t have to serve as a ‘look at this moment I can never go back to.’ Instead, look at them as ‘look at this moment, I was so happy this day.’ You know, it’s kind of like childhood. We have these photos from when we were younger. At birthday parties and whatnot. It’s sad growing up, sometimes we want to go back. But we know we can’t, so instead we look at photos to remember the joys of our youth. This can just be part of your youth.”</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>“I’ve been telling myself that this entire time.” You place the barely eaten strawberry into the stem bowl. “So I can see the end of the road, but my problem is I don’t know how to get there.”</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>He nods his head, pushing the strawberries off to the side. “Well, I can tell you right now that’s normally the opposite problem I have to deal with.”</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>You chuckle, nodding your head. “I’m a special one, aren’t I?”</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>“No,” he laughs. “That’s not what I’m saying. I’ve felt that myself a few times, as well as a few clients that dealt with the same issue. All I have to say to you is to just know that there’s an achievable end. You know there’s an end but it seems unattainable. So just know, it is achievable.”</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>“So I just have to wait?”</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>You knew what the answer was before you asked the question. You hated how powerless it made you feel, knowing it would get better but not knowing when.</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>You know you’re lucky in the sense that you know it will get better. Call it the control freak inside you that couldn’t stand not knowing when.</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>“Let me tell you why I chose to work on this floor,” he says, ignoring your question. “I chose this floor because while it can be hard seeing people go through this, it’s the easiest stage to work with someone on. I get paid to listen, share my two cents, and, if needed, tell a story of mine. For the most part though, I get paid to eat and hang out with people as friends. I’m not here to solve people’s problems, I’m here to listen. I can’t make you reach the end, but I can accompany you on the journey there.”</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>“Thank you.”</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>You know the response isn’t exactly the correct thing to say, but you feel so thankful to him in this moment. Hearing him say he wasn’t trying to push you ahead blindly felt so relieving. You never realized how suffocating the constant feeling of needing to get better was.</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>“You’re welcome.”</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>---</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>
    <em>You: Are you up? </em>
  </p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>
    <em>
      <strong>Renjun</strong>
    </em>
    <em>: Of course I’m up it’s only 9</em>
  </p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>
    <em>You: I don’t know you could be one of those early sleepers</em>
  </p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>
    <em>You: Anyways I have something I wanted to ask you</em>
  </p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>
    <em>Renjun: Go ahead</em>
  </p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>
    <em>You: Okay</em>
  </p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>
    <em>You: So I know we had this conversation two days ago but I’ve been thinking about it a lot lately and you’re right. </em>
  </p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>
    <em>You: I don’t want to hide from those memories anymore so I was wondering if I could send you some photos of me and her? I don’t know why but I just feel more comfortable doing this over text</em>
  </p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>
    <em>You: Is that okay?</em>
  </p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>
    <em>
      <strong>Renjun</strong>
    </em>
    <em>: Go for it. I’m ready to see into your past</em>
  </p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>
    <em>
      <strong>Renjun</strong>
    </em>
    <em>: (◎_◎)</em>
  </p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>
    <em>You: First of all that’s kinda creepy </em>
  </p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>
    <em>
      <strong>Renjun</strong>
    </em>
    <em>: No it isn’t</em>
  </p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>
    <em>You: Second of all thank you for letting me do this</em>
  </p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>
    <em>You: Let’s get started down memory lane shall we? </em>
  </p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>
    <em>You: First up we have her carrying Kyle on her back</em>
  </p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>
    <em>You: {image}</em>
  </p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>
    <em>
      <strong>Renjun</strong>
    </em>
    <em>: Is Kyle the bear on her back?</em>
  </p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>
    <em>You: Yep! You: Kyle is a five-foot-five stuffed bear she got me for Christmas</em>
  </p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>
    <em>You: He’s still sitting in my room</em>
  </p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>
    <em>
      <strong>Renjun</strong>
    </em>
    <em>: He’s beautiful </em>
  </p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>
    <em>
      <strong>Renjun</strong>
    </em>
    <em>: Also kind of an oddly specific height </em>
  </p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>
    <em>You: Not the point here</em>
  </p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>
    <em>You: Moving on!</em>
  </p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>
    <em>You: {image}</em>
  </p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>
    <em>You: This is just a nice photo of the two of us. This was taken when we went to the beach for her birthday. She dropped her piece of cake into the sand</em>
  </p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>
    <em>Renjun: That is one of the saddest things that could happen to a person</em>
  </p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>
    <em>You: I agree</em>
  </p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>
    <em>You: When it was dropped she just stared at it for a few seconds before sighing deeply and turning around to get more. One of the funniest things I have ever seen</em>
  </p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>
    <em>
      <strong>Renjun</strong>
    </em>
    <em>: That reminds me of last year on Donghyuck’s birthday</em>
  </p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>
    <em>
      <strong>Renjun: </strong>
    </em>
    <em>So we bought him this cake and had a celebration for him outside on this picnic table we used to have. We had it at like ten at night so we weren’t disturbing the guests. At the time we were still letting the staff bring their dogs into work from time to time and Lucas had brought Bella in that day</em>
  </p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>
    <em>
      <strong>Renjun</strong>
    </em>
    <em>: Long story short we set the cake on the table after he had blown out the candles and Ten-Hyung had run inside to get plates and everything. Being the stubborn man he is he had refused to ask for help and ended up dropping the box of silverware and most of the plates</em>
  </p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>
    <em>
      <strong>Renjun: </strong>
    </em>
    <em>Those of us who weren’t helping him pick it up were just watching. And if you told me 23 people would get distracted over a bunch of spilled forks and plates I don’t know if I would have believed you. Now comes the fun part</em>
  </p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>
    <em>
      <strong>Renjun</strong>
    </em>
    <em>: Eventually we hear Shotaro yell “Bella no!” She had managed to climb on top of the table and take a bite out of the middle of the cake </em>
  </p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>
    <em>You: Oh my god no </em>
  </p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>
    <em>
      <strong>Renjun</strong>
    </em>
    <em>: I know right! The look on Hyuck’s face is something I’ll remember for a long time. We ended up running to a near by store and buying him this small one in replacement </em>
  </p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>
    <em>You: Forget her, that is the saddest thing that could happen to a person on their birthday. At least she was able to get more</em>
  </p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>
    <em>
      <strong>Renjun</strong>
    </em>
    <em>: Eh he’s fine. He got his cake</em>
  </p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>
    <em>
      <strong>Renjun</strong>
    </em>
    <em>: Bring on the next photo</em>
  </p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>
    <em>You: Right</em>
  </p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>
    <em>You: Next we have this one. And she would kill me if she knew I was showing you this but oh well</em>
  </p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>
    <em>You: She isn’t here to stop me</em>
  </p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>
    <em>You: {image}</em>
  </p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>
    <em>
      <strong>Renjun: </strong>
    </em>
    <em>What even is that?</em>
  </p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>
    <em>You: I wish I could give you a straight anser</em>
  </p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>
    <em>You: Answer</em>
  </p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>
    <em>You: But the best I got is that she found a random towel and stuck it on her head. Next she wrapped this weird bead necklace that me or my brother must have made when we were like five around the towel. Then for some reason she made an ugly face</em>
  </p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>
    <em>
      <strong>Renjun</strong>
    </em>
    <em>: Well that sounds like it would have been a fun night </em>
  </p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>
    <em>You: I honestly don’t remember. I just know it was at mom’s house and I was thankful to have her there</em>
  </p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>
    <em>You: You know I think that’s why when she left it hurt so bad. She was the first person I was okay with letting into my life and seeing the hardships I had concerning my mom.  She would always be there when I was worried I was acting too much like my mom or when my brother was being too much for me to handle (he can be like her sometimes too)</em>
  </p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>
    <em>You: And before you say anything </em>
  </p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>
    <em>You: I’ve listened to what you said the past few days and I know how to look at it in a good way. Instead of thinking about how I don’t have this person to give me comfort, I can think of it as ‘I may not have this person anymore but the things she said helped me then and they can help me now.’ </em>
  </p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>
    <em>
      <strong>Renjun</strong>
    </em>
    <em>: That’s good y/n that’s a really good step</em>
  </p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>
    <em>You: What can I say I learn from the best</em>
  </p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>
    <em>You: Now the next photo isn’t of her but I miss my cat so here you go</em>
  </p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>
    <strong>---</strong>
  </p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>“I think you’re ready to move on.”</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>“Hello to you too,” you respond, pushing yourself off the bed and walking to stand in front of him by the door.</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>“You should know by now that a knock on the door is the only greeting I give. But seriously, I think at this point an Upward Turn staff member would be able to help you more than I can.”</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>“I-” you stutter, unsure what to say. “Do you mean right now?”</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>“No, silly,” he laughs. “Well, not at this moment anyway. It’s ten right now, so I would input you as ready to be transferred, you would get your staff member and new room, you’d pack up your suitcase, and then we move you up into your room. We can only move you once you’re processed as a transfer, and that takes at least an hour to be complete.”</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>He walks over to the table you guys sat at during your first meeting and pulled out the chair.  “I’ll input you as a transfer now, and then we can go do something.”</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>You take the seat opposite him, still surprised you were moving up a floor. He pulls out his phone, and without looking up from it asks, “Have you eaten yet?”</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>“Um no, I haven’t.”</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>“Awesome, then when I’m done with this, how about we go and get some breakfast?”</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>“Sounds good.”</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>“One last thing, do you not trust me?”</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>You furrow your eyebrows. “What?”</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>He looks up from his phone at you, raising an eyebrow as if to say ‘<em>Really</em>?’</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>“About moving on,” he clarifies, looking back down at his phone. “Do you not trust me?”</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>“No, of course, I trust you.”</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>“But?”</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>“But I just feel like it’s too soon, I don’t feel ready,” you mumble, for some reason feeling stupid for having your doubts.</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>He smiles kindly, pressing one more thing on his phone before placing it on the table. “Be honest, what more can I do for you? We’ve talked about what you were feeling, I let you have your two days of sadness before starting to slowly change those thoughts, and now, you’re at a point where you’re changing your way of thinking without me having to tell you to. Transforming that into something useful is much more suited for someone who works on The Upward Turn floor, don’t you think?”</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>You nod your head, shifting in your seat. “I just don’t feel completely ready yet. What if- I don’t know- what if I mess up somehow and I make it hard on him. I don’t want to make him uncomfortable with my not-ready-for-the-upward-turn-step?”</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>“You worry too much. But if it makes you better, let me just say that when we went through training for our floors, the staff on this floor had to receive training in the floor above us and vice versa. So if you feel you’re not completely ready, he can help you get the rest of the way there. You don’t need to worry, I’m sure you’re ready for what’ll happen up there.”</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>“Thanks, Renjun, that means a lot to me.” You smile at him as you lean back in your chair. “So you received training?”</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>He chuckles, mirroring your posture. “I wouldn’t exactly call it training so to say, more like lets all talk with people on our floor and compare ideas. For the most part, only staff on the same floor worked together, but this floor worked a little with the Upward Turn and Anger floors. We thought in order to help someone through these steps it was important to understand the steps before in case we needed to backtrack a little."</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>“For not having any real training, I’d say you’re all pretty good at your job.’</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>“Excuse you, I’m great at my job.”</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>---</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>“You ready to go?” Renjun asks, pushing the door open and leaning against the frame.</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>You sigh softly, nodding your head. You had never cared about leaving the rooms before, you had been too tired to care that you were leaving. But this room felt special.</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>Grabbing your suitcase, you walk towards him, stopping right before the door frame to look over your shoulder at the room. “Is it weird if I say I’m going to miss this room?”</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>“Not at all, I can imagine it’s going to be weird not seeing my handsome face every day.”</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>You snort, turning to face him. “Your face is the last thing I’m going to miss.”</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>“Ouch,” he laughs, pushing himself off the wall.</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>You close the door behind you, smiling softly at the playfulness between you two. <em>Definitely going to miss this. </em></p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>“So who’d you get paired with?” he asks as you walk side by side to the elevators.</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>“Taeil.”</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>He hums, nodding his head. “He’s nice. He’s kinda shy at first, but don’t let that scare you.”</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>“Noted,” you say, pressing the up button.</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>You’d be lying if you said you weren’t going to miss him. Granted, you probably would have felt this way about anyone who helped you at this stage of your heartbreak, but you can’t help the gratitude you feel towards him.</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>“Thank you again,” you say as you step into the elevator.</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>He chuckles, shaking his head. “You don’t need to thank me, this is my job.”</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>The elevator dings open, and you both walk silently to your assigned room. After struggling to open the door the first time, you push the door open to the new room.</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>You nod your head, looking around the new room. Every room looked pretty much the same with simple layout changes.For the first time since you got here you appreciate the familiarity.</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>“I know, you said I don’t have to thank you,” you say, turning to face him. “But I can’t tell you how much this means to me. I have this habit where I tend to, for lack of a better word, idolize people who help me. Since this whole thing happened, I decided I should tell people when they do something for me that I appreciate. So I really appreciate the support you’ve given me throughout this. It means the world.”</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>He smiles brightly and your heart hurts a little as you realize this is one of the last times you’ll see his smile. Throughout the days you’ve spent with him, you failed to realize how beautiful his smile is. You were too busy dealing with everything happening inside you, you never stopped to appreciate how much he smiled.</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>
    <em>The world needs more people like Renjun. </em>
  </p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>“I’m glad I could help you y/n, you were a pleasure to work with. And there’s no need to idolize me, I’m just doing a good job so I can continue to buy food using the company card.”</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>You laugh, looking down at your hands. “That’s a fair point, I can’t say I would do any different.”</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>“I’m glad you could see things my way.” He nods his head, letting a second of silence pass between you two before he points his thumb behind him towards the door. “Well, I’m going to get going, okay? I’ll see you at check out.”</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>You nod your head, whispering a ‘bye,’ as he turns and walks towards the door.</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>It feels weird knowing you’ll hold him in your memory as this great guy and he’ll only remember you as a client. I guess in some ways he is my idol.</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>“Hey, Renjun?”</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>“Yeah?”</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>“If you ever pass me on the street or something, promise me you’ll say hi?”</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>He smiles brightly at you. “Of course, y/n. I’ll see you at the gathering with all your other employees before you go, okay?”</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>You nod your head, waving a final goodbye to Renjun. With one last smile, he’s gone. Breathing in deeply, you turn to look at your new room. Letting out your breath, you smile to yourself as you realize the feelings of numbness aren’t as strong as before.</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>
    <em>After dreaming for so long, let’s start anew.</em>
  </p>
</div>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>I had so much fun writing this and I would love to know what you guys thought of it. Thank you so much for reading and have a wonderful day/night!</p></blockquote></div></div>
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